The Secret to Avoiding Your Feelings (And Living a Miserable Life)

A Satirical Guide about Emotional Suppression

Picture this: You’re going about your day, minding your own business, when suddenly an uncomfortable emotion starts to bubble up inside you. Maybe it’s sadness, anger, or fear. Whatever it is, it’s unpleasant and you want it gone ASAP.

Well, you are in luck!

Today, I’m going to share with you the secret techniques for running away from your feelings and living a life of constant denial. 

(It’s satire)

Step 1: Deny, Deny, Deny

The first step to running away from your feelings is simple: deny their existence. Whenever you feel a pang of sadness or a surge of anger, just tell yourself, “I’m fine.” 

Repeat this mantra until you almost believe it. Because acknowledging your emotions is for the weak.

Step 2: Distract Yourself Constantly

Why face your feelings when you can distract yourself with endless activities? 

Binge-watch your favorite TV shows, scroll through social media for hours, or dive into work until you forget what you were feeling in the first place.

Step 3: Avoid Deep Conversations

Deep conversations are a breeding ground for emotional vulnerability.

Stick to small talk and avoid any topic that might lead to an emotional revelation. 

If someone tries to dig deeper, quickly change the subject or make a joke to deflect.

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Step 4: Numb the Pain

When all else fails, numb the pain. 

Overindulge in food, alcohol, or other substances to dull your senses and keep those baaaad emotions at bay. 

After all, who needs to feel when you can just numb yourself into oblivion?

Step 5: Isolate Yourself

Isolation is key to avoiding emotional confrontation. Keep your distance from friends and family who might encourage you to open up. 

Congratulations! By following these steps, you’re well on your way to living a life of emotional suppression and constant denial. Sure, it might lead to a dreadful existence, but at least you won’t have to deal with those pesky feelings, right?

Okay, okay, I think you get the point.

Constantly avoiding and denying your feelings is a recipe for misery. It may provide temporary relief, but in the long run, it keeps you stuck and unfulfilled.

So what’s the alternative? How do we actually face our emotions in a healthy way? Find out in the next post, coming out next sunday! It will be titled something like: “How to Face Your Feelings (And Liberate Yourself in the Process)”

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How Less Can Give You More